Romans 7:18-20: I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.
After living enough life for eight lifetimes, it’s amazing I’m still here. Can I get an amen? The question now is, why? For what purpose does God keep me around His green earth? I’ve certainly done enough living for myself. So now, what can I do for Him?
It’s safe to say that left to my own devices, I make the wrong decision nearly every time. So how is it now that I can be so content, not relying on drugs or alcohol to numb out the pain in my life? There is still pain in my life, but there is an abundant joy now too that I found waiting behind the curtain of my own shadow. That joy is the grace of God and the love known as Jesus Christ!
All my life I would think that it was me who had to find God and come to Him to be completely free, and I would from time to time. When it suited my needs or I was down and out enough to cry out to him as I wallowed in my own pity. I know now that He was there the whole time waiting for me. Once I opened my eyes and heart to the real world, in which we all live, it was brilliantly easy to see. It was never me holding on to the hand of God, struggling to keep Him present in my life. The reality is that God was holding me up by my bootstraps all along. Let me try to paint the picture that God has impressed on my heart tonight:
This world is His world. Our daily struggles and trials are meant to be shared with Him, as we lean on Him. Every decision we make should not be made alone. I can attest to the authenticity that most people don’t make good decisions on their own. Of course there are the few, the proud, the unfortunate. Life comes easy to this select few and they think that they don’t need God to succeed. My heart goes out to them because an effortless life may feel like a triumph over the world but believe me, there is no victory without love.
We will all know the bitter sting of life’s end. What will we stand for in the days before our voices are lost to the wind of time? Do we stand for our own sacrifices, determination, and successes, or do we take a stand with the One, who’s successful determination accounted for His own sacrifice? We are not of this world that was created for us from the hands of a loving God. We are connected to His hands as He guides us through our given days with love.
I will rest my head tonight whispering gratitude and praise to the Most High and I will rise tomorrow doing the same. He will fulfill His promise in granting me wisdom to decide what paths to choose, as long as I lean on Him for understanding. Whatever comes my way through the minutes, hours, and days to come, I will know that God is holding me up so I can walk with Him… toward the light.
Galatians 5:16, So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature.
